How I Got My Triplets to SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT!!!!!!!

Where do I begin with this? I am still in shock and still waiting for them to revert back to their old ways, but after almost a month, I am thinking I can spill what I did and not jinx myself! But I cannot take all the credit for this, I had a wonderful motivator!

-The Background-

The girls had been getting up many times...many, many times. Natalee would have some good nights, then some bad nights, even though I always said she was my best sleeper. She doesn't necessarily want her bottle, just her Momma and she will put up a good fight to get me to go in and pick her up. I hated letting her cry, even though I knew it was all just a game. As soon as she would see me and I pick her up, she was all, "ohh" "eee", so happy and content! Little booger and I knew I was just being played! She would do this many, many times a night, just to see me. And I always gave in. Bad Mommy!


Madelynn, when she would wake up, she would be literally throwing herself across the crib, foaming at the mouth, screaming so loudly and practically making herself throw up by gagging constantly because she was crying so hard. No kidding. No exaggeration...DRAMA QUEEN! Then Claire would wake up and be so upset, she would do the same, but she would cry into her sheets, so not as loudly.


If I even let them cry five minutes, this would happen. And then I had 3 completely uncontrollable screaming babies! 


All would be solved if I walked in and gave warm bottles. That was their ONLY way they would calm down. Even just a few sucks and all in life was better, 4 ounces, and they would roll over and go to sleep. 

-I tried SO many things and suggestions-

I gave water, cold, warm, room temperature, it didn't work. 


Binkis or Lovies never worked in the middle of the night. 


Some nights, Madelynn would drink 30 ounces, yes, 30 ounces, each in 4 ounce bottles. Count how many times I would be up just with her on those nights. So, I tried giving more in a bottle during the first time she woke up to see if she would then sleep for a few extra hours. Not so much. Never worked. 


Tried giving them a different formula, that just upset them off even more, and didn't work.


I tried letting them scream, and then they would all be screaming, for hours. I didn't like that. It didn't work.


We have a great schedule, the same every day. My girls do not have a problem with falling asleep, they go in their cribs awake with no problem. It is strictly in the middle of the nights. I asked the doctor and she suggested having them drink and eat more during the day, and that didn't work either.


I consulted every book I could find, read what others did, researched about multiples in one room together....nothing gave me the answers. I would just laugh and think, yeah right that won't work on my foaming-at-the-mouth children!

-My Issues are Big too-

I felt bad for them and me. I still have guilt from leaving my babies in the NICU and not being able to come to them when they cried, how horrible it was knowing I wasn't there to be with them when all they wanted was their Momma. I swear it will haunt me until the day I die. You don't know the pain you could have in your heart until it's your flesh and blood that you have to leave each day, so little, so vulnerable, so alone. Now I am here for them and letting them cry is just so, so, so hard. Way too hard for me. I read about all the dangers there are when you let them cry as some researchers say, and how they can become less attached to their Momma and have trust issues later on in life. Every way of some sleep-training out there, has supportive and not-so supportive research. It's all so confusing and it can be SO controversial.


But, regardless what I was trying wasn't working. I knew that. Some nights I just layed in bed crying myself and praying to God that I would find some answer into what I was doing wrong, and where the answers were. Multiples are hard. Hard. This was proving to be the hardest transition so far for me, and them.


I was at my wits end, actually I was at my wits end for weeks, months...enough was enough. I just kept saying "tomorrow" or "later" when they aren't sick, or teething or just wanting their Momma. 


But regardless, I knew it was a habit that they formed. Nothing more. They are not needing a bottle, they just are wanting bottle. Habits are hard to break though.

-Transition-

So, one night I decided this was it: an 8 ounce night-time bottle and then one 4 ounce bottle in the middle of the night. I can deal with getting up once, but not ten or fifteen times. The first night, it was a Thursday, it somewhat worked. I was up until 2am listening to them on the monitor, crying myself. It was pure hell. I hated myself. I felt like such a bad Mommy. I finally gave in, because I wanted some sleep myself. It was so exhausting and again, I just said, forget it. They each had two bottles I believe, which was an improvement I thought, but not for me. I was a mess. I was even mad at myself for doing it to them, even though they woke up with smiles on their faces.


The next day, I research more and referred to my books. I can  and I was going to figure this out. I am smarter than my children, for now. They are barely one. I am in charge. I am THE MOMMY!


I found a "sleep lady" and talked to her for a few minutes. I even made an appointment with her for two weeks later, because if by then my method of "operation-no-method" wasn't working then I will pay the $150 to meet with her. Also, I consulted some ladies on Facebook. The dreaded, so-much-I-hate Facebook. 

-Motivation-

Luckily my close friend, The Diaper Diva, Melissa called me and we talked for awhile and I found out what she did with her two young boys. It was simply amazing and gave me this motivation I can't even describe!! She knows me inside and out and I respect her so much as a friend, wife and mother. She is one of very few go-to mom's that I trust one hundred percent, and we are so alike that I know if she can do it, so can I. 


I really learned SO much from our conversation! She hit every nail on the head; on developmentally what the girls were doing, how I was feeling and how easily this problem could be solved. One main thing was that they are NOT going to die from crying. Sometimes they need to cry. Sometimes it's good for them. Sometimes that's how they get that excess energy out. I knew it was a game with them, a habit, but I needed reassurance. They are not truly hungry even though they drink the whole bottle. They are old enough to learn. I knew they were smart enough to get me to come in, so they are smart enough to know that I am not coming in because it's night-time and time to sleep!! 


So that night I was so excited for bed-time and couldn't wait to try out all the wonderful tricks and suggestions Melissa told me. My I can't do this-I'm a bad mommy and mean attitude was out the door!

-Friday Night-

At bed time, I changed a few very small things. Instead of letting them fall asleep with their bottle, as sometimes they would, I made sure they were still awake when they were finished with their bottle. I left the light on and the door open a little longer, going in and out while they drank their bottles, until they were all done. Once they were all done, I then took the bottle, gave them their binki and lovie, turned off the lights and shut the door. I made sure they drank all 8 ounces. Natalee doesn't sometimes, but she at least drinks 6 ounces.


Still kept on the white noise machine and lullaby's all night. 

Once they went to bed and fell asleep, I let them be. I turned off the monitor and just knew that it would be so much better if I didn't hear them crying at all. Of course if they really cry, I will hear them anyway since our door is open and their room is right down the hall, but it won't wake me up unless they are really screaming. I was ok with it. To be honest, it wasn't that hard! Once I fell asleep, I woke up only a few times to them crying and I just kept telling myself, they won't die from crying, they are smart girls, they are playing me, I am THE MOMMY and I am in charge here!!!! I DID NOT GO IN! Never once! 


I gave them each a 4 ounce bottle at 3AM (because ya know, if you are used to eating a full meal in the middle of the night and then someone takes it completely away, that is not so nice, so I elected to do this for three nights and then take that 4 ounces away). I walked in handed bottles out and walked straight out of the room. And it worked perfectly. They woke up Saturday morning at 9:00am, with smiles on their faces! (see, I'm telling you, it was FAR MORE traumatic to me than them!!!)

-Saturday Night-

Same situation, but less crying, one bottle each. Woke up at 9am, with smiles! I got WAY more confident! I AM doing the right thing.

-Sunday Night-

No crying what-so-ever! In complete disbelief! Gave Natalee her bottle at 5am, she only drank 2 ounces. Didn't pick her up, nothing. Right back to sleep. Everyone slept until 9am, woke up with smiles! No questions, THIS IS WORKING!!!!!


I began to realize I owe Melissa more than I can provide in one lifetime. I pray she has a special place in Heaven. She has been my Savior!

-The Last 3 Weeks-

Each night that passed was better and better. I did turn the monitor back on, finally. I am still in disbelief. Occasionally one of them wakes up, and I hear them but it literally lasts for a few minutes and they are back to sleep. Even Madelynn; there is no foaming, no throwing herself across the crib, no gagging. Natalee, can still put up a good fight at times, but literally the crying is under ten minutes, if that. 


They are going to bed at 7:30PM and normally I have to wake them up at 9:00AM!


Also, I can go in their room now and they don't scream even harder when I leave. It's amazing. I can pick them up, give them hugs and kisses, assure them that I am right there, that it's night-time and time to sleep and they go right back to sleep. Nothing else needed. AH-MA-ZING!!!!


Their naps have improved too, (even though they took great scheduled naps prior to this) they are totally sleeping from 1:00PM until 4:00PM, no peeps what-so-ever and when we normally have to wake them up!

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I must say, I was completely and utterly is disbelief, totally against doing anything that might, by research accounts, "harm my baby" but let me tell you, I HAVE MY LIFE BACK and my children are NOT harmed the least bit! This is the most wonderful gift I have been given! I can't tell you how lucky I feel and how IT PROVES that I was the one HOLDING THEM BACK. I swore I would never do that and I was. I was the one making this happen, not them. I feel bad for that. They wanted to sleep through the night, and I wasn't giving them the tools to be able to do so. I am so glad I didn't wait for "tomorrow" or "the next day" and I did it finally. It may have taken me awhile, but I am so glad I didn't wait ONE MORE DAY!


I swore nothing would work for MY CHILDREN. I was wrong. Letting them find their own and figuring out how they can soothe themselves really does work. I am SO for it and I am SO glad I finally did it. Thank you, Melissa, from the bottom of my heart!


If anyone has any questions, please do not hesitate to leave a comment or email me!